Mextrosexuality and Maintenance

My husband takes a shower.  Combs his hair.  Puts on clean clothes.  This is the high water mark of  his daily grooming routine.  For me, it’s a shower, shave legs, armpits, shampoo, condition.  Then face moisturizer, body moisturizer, perfume, makeup (a complex rhythmic dance of brushes and artistic talent), hair gel, coordinating the outfit, shoes, jewelry, etc.  On top of this, worrying about the following:  hair color, bikini area, exfoliation, manicures, pedicures, etc.  It’s exhausting. 

First, I’m actually glad my husband is not a metrosexual.  This cuts down enormously on his grooming expenditures, leaving more money for me.  Second, I don’t want to be married to a man who needs more “mirror” time than I do, although now with four bathrooms this hardly seems to be an issue.  What fascinates me is that he thinks he has done more than enough for himself and society with his minimalistic routine.  I, on the other hand, think there is always something more to be done. 

So what can a woman do to even the playing field?  Resistance is futile.  I suggest indulging one’s beauty needs to the fullest.  Go ahead and get those highlights, enjoy that pedicure, and relish the fact that all of the time you spend pampering yourself will lead to self-enlightenment.  And if you are not spiritually renewed, try a glass of wine.  Perhaps some Gary Farrell Pinot Noir or Cloudy Bay Sauvignon Blanc.  After a few glasses you’ll be looking just fine.

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One Response to Mextrosexuality and Maintenance

  1. kim dennison says:

    Ellen i could not agree with you more, on all points. Well said!

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